Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Randomize
