im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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