I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
