I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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