woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'm at about main and main street
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
