absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
