I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
