I'm sorry my penis didn't work
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize