Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
