My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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