i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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