And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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