Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize