I don't usually arrange sex via text message
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Randomize