forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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