im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
false alarm, still single
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
