my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
