so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
