she was so not down for the gang bang
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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