i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Randomize
