Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
