ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
