Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
