Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
