Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
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