Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
