i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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