if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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