He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
