I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Randomize
