Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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