i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
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