youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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