I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize