Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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