we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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