you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
