We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
