there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
