so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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