Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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