question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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