Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
My vagina is officially offended.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
