Taylor Swift is so right about you.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
