Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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