All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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