i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize