It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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