We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I AM VODKA MAN
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
