Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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