Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
