I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
